The Benefit Of Command

Posted on 13 Sep 2016 @ 12:30am by Captain Harvey Geisler & Ensign Kelly Khan

2,887 words; about a 14 minute read

Mission: Click Three Times
Location: USS Chimera
Timeline: MD7 || 1715 hours

The Chimera had grown steadily quiet throughout the day. One by one, the crewmembers said their goodbyes to the ship and left via a shuttle to their new assignments on the Black Hawk or Cochrane. Harvey knew their pain full well. He'd served on several ships during the Dominion War that were destroyed or decommissioned while he was aboard. One always hoped a ship would retire, but that was a luxury afforded to a unique few.

It would feel better if these crewmembers weren't stepping into a role where the previous owner hadn't been killed. Harvey was certain there would be an extra pang of guilt if that individual had been killed because of the Chimera's or Cochrane's actions.

What's done was done at this point. And now, Captain Geisler and Cadet Khan had taken on the final assignment, activating the self-destruct system. Rather than set it on a timer like most, the Chimera would be remote detonated as they departed. A timer detonation would produce a brilliant light, one that would be seen from outside the nebula, and given the secretive nature of this mission, the last thing they wanted to do was attract attention. Therefore, the antimatter pods had been split among the other two ships and the antiprotons drained from the deflector charging array. This explosion would come strictly from the auto-destruct, along with a few extra proton torpedoes that were tied into the system.

And now the moment had come. Everything was in place, and it was time to arm the system. They would do so from Engineering, as it was much closer to the shuttlebay than the bridge. Cadet Khan would be first, as the Acting Captain. Captain Geisler would take the place of the ship's Executive Officer, using command codes that lay dormant in the system as a representative of Task Group Belvedere. Such was protocol in situations like this.

Throughout the process of scuttling the Chimera, Kelly had worked in near silence with the efforts of two people despite how tired and sore she was. Rage fueled her work and she had nearly orders a few times when someone wasn't holding up their end of what needed to be done. She felt as if a dark depression had settled on her shoulders and knew that it shouldn't; the Chimera had only been hers to command for a limited time and she should have been grateful for the opportunity.

Now she found herself in Engineering with Captain Geisler and her stomach felt as if were tied in knots as she looked at the pool table where they would give the final commands ever to be uttered on the Intrepid class starship. She was the acting Captain of the Chimera and Captain Geisler had told her what her duty would be and what needed to be said. She swallowed hard as she laid her palm on the interface as if willing it a silent goodbye.

It took her two times to try to force the words from her mouth as it felt like her throat wanted to deny them by refusing to allow the air she needed to speak to come from her lungs. Finally, Kelly took a deep breath and drew her shoulders square, but wouldn't meet Captain Geisler's gaze that she felt on her. "Computer," she began, surprised to find that it didn't hold a waiver. "Identify Acting Captain Kelly M. Khan. Active self-destruct remote capability, authorization Alpha Nine Zero One Seven Delta Four Two."

Harvey raised an eyebrow at the Cadet's lengthy authorization as the computer beeped its approval. "Computer," he said, placing a hand on the interface near him. "Captain Harvey E. Geisler, Task Group Belvedere Subgroup B Acting Command. Confirm auto-destruct, authorization Geisler Seven One One Gamma Foxtrot."

The computer beeped and whirred in reply. Instantly, all of the screens around them changed to reflect the auto-destruct had been activated.

"It's done," Kelly said quietly as she were reading the time of death on a patient who had become a friend. She still wouldn't meet the Captain's eyes, but knew that sooner or later she would have to. "Are you ready to go back to the Black Hawk, Captain?"

Harvey took a look around Engineering a final time, specifically the deactivated warp core. A couple dead crewman still lay on the floor, a harrowing reminder of why they had to do this in the first place. He nodded his confirmation to the cadet and turned to leave Engineering. "You know," he told her, "I thought I'd never have to do this again."

She turned away to follow him, her heart heavy at the loss of so much life all because of an enemy that had infiltrated the ranks of Starfleet. "Again, Sir?" she queried, but only a fraction of her mind was on it. The rest replayed the battle with the Valdore and what she could have been done differently. She knew that the majority of the damage had been done by the Valkyrie fighters and they had not been given a choice in the matter when the Chimera had turned on the Black Hawk.

"The Andrews," he replied, walking down the corridor. "I started as a Chief Medical Officer, but was forced to step up to Executive Officer when most of the bridge crew was killed in a Dominion attack. We got caught behind Dominion lines for a while, and by the time we made it out, we were lucky the ship was still in one piece. Much like the Chimera, its back was broken. The CO of the ship that found us made the decision to scuttle her."

Kelly shuddered as she walked beside of him and finally looked over at him; he deserved that from her and she couldn't ignore the voice of experience that he spoke with. "It couldn't have been an easy decision," she said, still unsure of what she could and could not say and did her best to stay neutral. She couldn't blame him for the damage that had been done to the Chimera and knew that the commanding officer of the Intrepid class ship wouldn't have thought twice about destroying the Black Hawk with all hands aboard.

"It wasn't," Harvey replied, arriving at a turbolift entrance. With no one else aboard, the doors parted immediately as the turbolift hadn't moved since they left it a while ago. "Especially when Starfleet needed every ship it could get."

Anger bubbled under her surface and she bit her bottom lip, her eyes closed for a long moment after she stepped into the turbolift. "It isn't fair," she muttered, the tone of her voice accusatory even though she wasn't placing the blame on him. "Sir." Even mad, her training kicked in and made her respect the uniform and pips that he had earned.

Harvey grunted, almost humorously. "Graduation is a month away and you still have a lot to learn, Cadet, about fairness." Biting back a sigh, he looked at her as the doors closed and the lift began to climb to the deck above. Harvey often felt as if he'd been the antithesis of fairness. His family didn't care much for him, the only woman he'd loved died early into their marriage, and his career stalled greatly as a result. "The first rule is, there's no such thing as fair. If there were, there'd be no Dominion, no Consortium, hell, not even papercuts."

"I'm aware of the fact that nothing is fair, Sir," she said. "I wasn't even given a chance to know my real Mom because she died when I was born. That wasn't fair. The wars we fight aren't fair. Nothing is fair, as you said." She paused, then continued when something else started to bug her.

"I have a name, Captain Geisler," Kelly said as she looked up at him. "I'm aware that it isn't required that it be said and I'm aware I haven't been calling you by yours, but it would be nice to be recognized once in a while. Am I just some nameless person who does what they're told to do and filed away in a personnel file somewhere and promptly forgotten? Is it easier to accept when those under your command die if you don't give them names and personalities while restricting them to bits of data listed by the good or bad that they did?"

The turbolift finished its short ride and opened its doors. With not another soul aboard, Harvey made no move to vacate so the turbolift could give another a ride. He turned to face her. "I'm fully aware of your name, Kelly Khan. I know the names of all five hundred and thirty who serve on the Black Hawk. I know the name of every person that was irradiated by Thalaron, sucked out into space, or even killed. What kind of Captain would I be if I saw people as just uniforms in a corridor or in a room. Every person aboard my ship has value, just like the Chimera. Every time I see a lifeless body on this ship, I'm reminded of my own failure. Then again, it was unrealistic to think that I could rescue almost three hundred people. That, Cadet Khan, is what's unfair. That people had to die for stupidity."

With each passing word that came from the Captain's lips, the young Cadet wanted to find a hole, crawl in it and pull it in on herself. She didn't know what had inspired her to be so selfish as to want to have her name spoken in some form of personal recognition when so people had died. "I understand, Sir, and I apologize. That was uncalled for and unbecoming of a Cadet, Captain."

"It absolutely was, Cadet Khan," Harvey quickly agreed. "Now, tell me, Cadet. Did you, in the last twenty four hours as Master and Commander of the USS Chimera, do everything within your power to inspire those under your command, and make every possible decision with utmost confidence while you were in the chair? Did you?"

"Yes, Captain Geisler, I did," Kelly said with utter assurance in the actions she had taken while in command of the Chimera. "I put myself right there with everyone else and did everything in my power to ensure that they knew I was there for them as much as I needed them to be there for me, Sir."

"And if this is how you feel after all of that..." he replied, his tone still gruff. He paused, letting his tirade and his point settle, examining the Cadet's demeanor and judging once and for all her sincerity. Satisfied, he took a step forward, lifted both hands, and gently placed them on her shoulders. "Then you, Kelly," he said gently. "You will be in good company when you make Captain. It's perfectly normal to question your actions after the fact. It keeps you grounded, and keeps you from being prideful. The moment you think you've made it is the moment you will make the worst decision of your career. Never doubt your actions, but don't be afraid of making regrets either."

Tears started to slide down the brunette's cheeks and she hung her head in shame. "No matter what I did, it wasn't enough, though. For a moment, I considered taking the Chimera away from the battle to save more lives, but I knew it would have cost more lives on the Black Hawk and Cochrane and I couldn't do that, Captain," she said softly. "I had the helm flying directly at it and gave Tactical the chance to unleash every bit of hell this ship had to give at that Romulan ship."

"Kobayashi Maru," he said again to the cadet, having used that same name earlier that day. "Yesterday was a no-win scenario, except this time it wasn't a test. And, it won't be the next time, or the time after. Your unleashing hell gave us the chance we needed to beat Captain Suresh at her own game."

"I don't believe in a no-win scenario, Sir," Kelly said as she looked back up at him with red rimmed eyes. "Even if we saved one life, it's a win in my book."

"And you saved the crew of this ship. Sounds like a win to me," Harvey said with a smile, "even if it doesn't feel like it."

"I know," she said. "Next time, if there is a next time, I'm going to find a way to save more lives." She paused and looked up at him. "You said that I'll be in good company when I make Captain, Sir, but that's not my goal. Does that make me a coward to not want to make life and death decisions for a ship and crew?"

"Of course not," he said, looking into her eyes. "But as long as you plan to wear this uniform, you will eventually be responsible for people under you, even as a test pilot. The lessons you learn here will help define that career."

"I have a lot to learn, Captain," Kelly said. "And I'd like to learn them from you until I get reassigned, but...I'd like permission to request Black Hawk as my first official assignment after graduation, Sir. She's a fine ship and has a Captain that I know won't steer me wrong."

Harvey's smile became a smirk. "That, Miss Khan, can be arranged. But for now, it's time to go." He released his hold on her and began to walk down the corridor towards the shuttlebay.

"Thank you, Sir," she said as she fell into step beside of him. A step, she decided, was going to be the right one for the direction she wanted her career to go in and with a Captain she could and would learn from. "Would you like me to fly or would you prefer to take us back?"

"Seems to me like you could use a bit of time in your element before calling it a day, Miss Khan," Harvey said, spotting the shuttlebay door. Inside was a Type-9 shuttle that still had a couple well stocked crates inside them, the final haul from the Chimera.

With a weary nod, Kelly opened the hatch and stepped aside to allow him to enter first. "The benefit of Command, Sir," she said after she mustered a smile. "The benefit of Command."

Harvey took his seat and began to quickly breeze through the pre-flight procedures. "There is one thing though, Cadet. We're going to have a bit of an issue when we get back to the Black Hawk."

Kelly came aboard and took the pilot's seat, watching him go through the pre-flight and smiled inwardly. He may have been rusty at piloting, but he had a light and sure touch. "What's that, Captain?" she asked him.

"Whether you admit it or not," he told her, completing the checks and powering up the warp drive, "I believe you donned that uniform in the heat of a crisis and did so for the benefit of the crew of the Chimera. The moment you set foot on the Black Hawk though, you'll officially be out of uniform." He looked over at her. "I'm not sure if you are aware, but I take such protocols very seriously."

"I can remove it, Sir," Kelly responded before she thought about what she said and blushed. "Er...I hereby request permission to beam directly back to my quarters and change when we arrive, Captain."

"Who said anything about removing it?" he asked, reaching over to place a small object on the top of her console. Of course, where he was sitting, it would be impossible for her to notice that the right side of his collar had been a little lighter since boarding the shuttle.

"But I'll be out of unif..." her words trailed off when she saw the pip sitting on the top of the console. "Sir?" she queried hesitantly as she looked over at him, her expression between shock and amazement that she would get promoted while looking like a wreck and having acted as she did earlier.

He only smiled at the Ensign before looking back to the forcefield protected opening in front of them. Without a moment's hesitation, he engaged the engines and propelled the shuttle out of the bay. "Consider it an early graduation present," he told her. "Besides, a battlefield commission will keep you on the Black Hawk for a while longer, especially when this is all over. And then there's the most important fact. You earned it, Ensign Khan, even though you don't feel like it."

"Thank you, Sir!" Kelly said as she reached up and removed her Cadet tabs and replaced it with the pip that he had personally taken from his own uniform and placed it carefully on her collar and she planned on keeping forever. "I won't let you down, Captain," she promised him. "Ever."

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